The best thing you can do for yourself is believe in yourself. You know you’re a valuable person, and you should act like it. By realizing your own true potential everybody else will too. When you think positively, you develop the confidence that attracts people to you.

When you feel good about yourself and what you have to offer, people recognize this and they want to learn more about you. A positive attitude is the best thing you can bring to any table. You are your own strongest asset. The best way to begin thinking positively about yourself is to “do your homework.” Here are five simple steps that can help you fully realize how valuable you are:

1. Assess yourself

Make a mental list or jot down on paper what your best qualities are. It’s important to be honest with yourself about this. You need to know these things, so you’ll feel confident about communicating them to others. Put aside some time to make this list, so you will be prepared when the time comes. If you’re not sure where to start, ask a trusted friend who knows you well to suggest what they think your strongest points are.

2. Keep a positive state of mind

Remember, you CAN fulfill your dreams. If you have had bad luck in the past, remind yourself that there’s always hope. Hard work does pay off. You may not find it right away, but if you stay positive, you will get positive results.

3. Re-program yourself

Sometimes the only thing getting in our way is ourselves. Your mind frame has a lot to do with the way you see things and how you get things done.

Make everything you do somehow benefit you or someone you care about. Keep reminding yourself that the end result will be a good one. Next, make little changes that will help you in the long run. Lastly, don’t focus on the things you’ve done (or faced) that have hurt you. Instead, focus on the things you’ve done to improve yourself and make a list of things you can do from now on to create a positive outlook.

4. Visualize and achieve

The most important thing about positive thinking, is seeing yourself achieving your goal. You know you can do it, so start by telling yourself that. You are your best motivator, so act as if. Visualize yourself in the dreams you desire and you will start to believe. Whatever you do-take yourself seriously. You have the power, so use it. Visualize by imagining or seeing a picture of what you want in your mind. Believing in yourself is the best thing you can do to get closer to your dream. Realize this dream and you will achieve it.

With your newfound attitude, you should be moving fast on the road to success. You will be amazed by the power of positive thinking and how much it can do for you. This will give you the power and confidence to prove yourself to others (and yourself) and show how indispensable you are.

The Determinant of Your Success

Perhaps the most powerful single factor in your success is your beliefs about yourself. We call this the Law of Belief. It says simply this: Whatever you believe, with feeling, becomes your reality. Whatever you intensely believe becomes your reality. That we have a tendency to block out any information coming in to us that is inconsistent with our reality.

What Successful People Believe

Successful people absolutely believe that they have the ability to succeed. And they will not entertain, think about, or talk about the possibilities that they’ll fail. They do not even consider the possibility of failure.

Positive Thinking Versus Positive Knowing

You always act in a matter consistent with your beliefs. The most important belief system you can build is a prosperity consciousness where you absolutely believe that you are going achieve your financial goals. We call this positive knowing versus positive thinking. Positive thinking can sometimes be wishing or hoping. But positive knowing is when you absolutely know that no matter what, you will be successful.

The Foundation of Willpower

Another principle related to your beliefs is willpower. We know that willpower is essential to any success. Willpower is based on confidence. It’s based on conviction. It’s based on faith. It’s based on your belief in your ability to triumph over all obstacles. And you can develop willpower by persistence, by working on your goals, by reading the biographies of successful people, by listening to audio programs, by reading books about people who’ve achieved success. The more information you take into your mind consistent with success, the more likely it is that you will develop the willpower to push you through the obstacles and difficulties you will experience.

Resolve to Achieve Greatly

Self-mastery, self-control, self-discipline are essential for anyone who wants to achieve greatly. And control over your thoughts is the hardest exercise in self-mastery that you will ever engage in. See if you can talk and think about only what you desire and not talk or think about anything that you don’t want for 24 hours. Then you’ll see what you’re really made of. It’s a hard thing to do but with practice, you can reach the point where you are thinking about your goals and desires most of the time. Then, your whole life will change for the better.

Proactive people are clear about what’s important to them and why. They cut through the clutter of uncertainty to make decisions and take action. Reactive people, on the other hand, allow themselves to wallow in a fog of uncertainty, forever reacting to events and circumstances that seem beyond their control.

When you live reactively, you do give up control, but you can never give up responsibility. To the degree that you fail to make decisions for yourself, someone else will come along and make those decisions for you, whether it be your parents, your spouse, your boss, the media, or societal conditioning. After a time you’ll find yourself enduring a life you never really wanted… always working to fulfill someone else’s goals and never your own.

Proactive people accept that it’s impossible to avoid responsibility for one’s results in life, so they jump in and participate willingly. Instead of living as mere statistics and playing follow-the-follower, they make conscious choices based on their unique values, beliefs, and goals. Consequently, they enjoy a sense of passion and purpose that is forever denied those who live reactively.

Here are 10 suggestions for creating more clarity in your life, so you can enjoy a life of meaning and fulfillment:

1. Define your life purpose. Use the Discover Your Purpose process to create your personal statement of purpose. Whenever you’re faced with a key decision, ask yourself which option best fits your purpose. In many cases the correct decision will become clear. As you continue using your purpose to make decisions, you’ll gradually align the various parts of your life with your purpose, which will greatly improve your overall sense of clarity and direction.
2. Set clear goals. When you have no goals, you’re like a ship adrift at sea; the sea will toss you around aimlessly. When you have fuzzy goals, you’re like a ship with a broken navigational system; no matter how hard your try, you’ll only spin in circles. When you have clear, unambiguous goals, you’re a ship with a destination sailing full speed ahead. Goals build clarity by cutting through the fog of indecision.
3. Select your own experiences. Life is an experience, not an accomplishment. Some paths are more interesting and rewarding than others even though the destinations may be similar. Suppose you’d like to develop a certain level of fitness. Perhaps you could achieve it by working out in your home. But maybe you could also get there by training at a martial arts studio. Don’t just focus on outcomes. Consider your experiential preferences too, so you enjoy the journey as well as the destination.
4. Assess your values. Do you want your life to be secure or adventurous? Peaceful or courageous? Healthy or wealthy? Read Living Your Values, and use the List of Values to

gain clarity about what’s most important to you in life. Knowing your top 3-5 values will provide you with a much deeper level of self-knowledge.

5. Create a personal accountability system. Assemble all your best clarity-building tools — your purpose statement, your values, your goals, and more — in one convenient place, and review them regularly to keep your life flowing in the direction of your dreams. Read the Personal Accountability System article to learn more.
6. Keep a journal. When you record a thought or idea and read it back, you’ll being seeing it from a different angle. This perspective shift can provide a new level of clarity, as some ideas appear very different once you get them out of your head. Also, whenever a thought or idea has been recorded, you’ll feel better about mentally releasing it, which helps you stay focused on the current task or project.
7. Ask a friend. Since your friend is probably not as emotionally invested in your situation as you are, s/he will be able to see your situation from a broader perspective. If your friend and you have similar values, chances are your decisions will be similar. But it’s often easier to make a wise decision when you aren’t the one who has to implement it, so consulting a friend can help you gain certainty that your decision is correct.
8. Embrace mistakes. Let go of the idea that your decisions must be perfect. The more decisions you make, the more mistakes you’ll make. Often that’s exactly what you need to do because there are many situations where the correct decision can only be recognized after a series of mistakes. Very few people find the perfect career or relationship on the first try. Clarity grows with experience, and experience comes from making mistakes.
9. Recognize when you already have clarity. If you find yourself spending an inordinate amount of time trying to gain clarity in some area, you may already know what to do, but you lack the courage to follow through. Don’t go back to the drawing board and rework all your plans from scratch. Keep the decision in front of you, and work on building the courage to implement it. Start by admitting to yourself, “I know this is the correct decision, but currently I lack the strength to proceed.” Listen to Podcast #2 and read The Courage to Live Consciously for further advice.
10. Ride it out. Sometimes your life will be struck by events that uproot your sense of certainty. Even positive events such as moving to a new city can have this effect. Taking a few weeks to reorient yourself is very reasonable… several months for a major life change. But when you recognize that you’re no longer in a necessary incubation period, it’s time to set some fresh goals.

When you find yourself stuck in a fog of uncertainty, you can still make conscious decisions and plan your way out of the fog. However, that alone will not cause the fog to lift. Only after you get moving will you come to the edge of the fog, and then you’ll be able to see much farther ahead. Clarity is greatest when you’re in motion, not when you’re standing still.

http://www.stevepavlina.com/articles/

There is a close association between personal charisma and success in life. Probably 85 percent of your success and happiness will come from your relationships and interactions with others. The more positively others respond to you, the easier it will be for you to get the things you desire.

The Law of Attraction
In essence, when we discuss charisma, we are talking about the law of attraction. This law has been stated in many different ways down through the centuries, but it basically says that you inevitably attract into your life the people and circumstances that harmonize with your dominant thoughts.

You Are A Living Magnet
In a sense, you are a living magnet, and you are constantly radiating thought waves, like a radio station radiates sound waves, that are picked up by other people. Your thoughts, intensified by your emotions, as radio waves are intensified by electric impulses, go out from you and are picked up by anyone who is tuned in to a similar wavelength. You then attract into your life people, ideas, opportunities, resources, circumstances and anything else that is consistent with your dominant frame of mind.

The law of attraction also explains how you can build up your levels of charisma so that you can have a greater and more positive impact on the people whose cooperation, support and affection you desire.

Perception Is Everything
The critical thing to remember about charisma is that it is largely based on perception. It is based on what people think about you. It is not so much reality as it is what people perceive you to be. For example, one person can create charisma in another person by speaking in glowing terms about that person to a third party. If you believe that you are about to meet an outstanding and important person, that person will tend to have charisma for you.

Mother Teresa of Calcutta
One of the most charismatic people in the world was Mother Teresa of Calcutta. In a physical sense, she was a quiet, elderly, frail woman in poor health, and she wore a modest nun’s habit. She might have been ignored by a person passing her on the street, were it not for the tremendous charisma she developed and for the fact that her appearance was so well-known to so many people as a result.

How Would You Feel?
If someone told you that he was going to introduce you to a brilliant, self-made millionaire who was very quiet and unassuming about his success, you would almost naturally imbue that person with charisma, and in his presence, you would not act the same as you would if you had been told nothing at all. Charisma begins largely in the mind of the beholder.

Lasting charisma depends more upon the person you really are than upon just the things you do.

Continually look for ways to improve other’s perceptions of you so that you can be more influential with them. Be a living magnet.

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Be clear about the messages you are sending and the perceptions you are creating in others.
Are these perceptions consistent with the impressions you want to make?

Second, see yourself and imagine yourself every day as an important powerful and charming person.
Treat others as you would if you were already strong, famous and influential.

1. Lack of motivation.
A talent is irrelevant if a person is not motivated to use it. Motivation may be external (e.g. social approval) or internal (e.g. satisfaction). External sources tend to change and so lead to more inconsistent performance, compared to internal sources of motivation.

2. Lack of impulse control.
Impulsiveness can get in the way of optimal performance. For example, people might not bring their full intellectual resources to bear on a problem, but go with the first solution that pops into their heads.

3. Lack of perseverance and perseverance.
Some people give up too easily, while others cannot give up, even when the quest will clearly be fruitless.

4. Using the wrong abilities.
People may not use the right abilities for the tasks in which they are engaged.

5. Inability to translate thought into action.
Some people seem buried in thought. They have good ideas, but rarely seem able to do anything about them.

6. Lake of product orientation.
Some people seem more concerned about the process than the result of activity.

7. Inability to complete tasks.
For some people, nothing ever draws to a close. This may be due to fear of what they would do next or fear of becoming hopelessly enmeshed in detail.

8. Failure to initiate.
Still others are unwilling or unable to initiate a project, perhaps because of indecision or fear of commitment.

9. Fear of failure.
People may not reach peak performance because they avoid the really important challenges in life.

10. Procrastination.
Some people are unable to act without pressure. They also look for little things to do in order to put off the big tasks.

11. Mis-attribution of blame.
Some people always blame themselves for even the slightest mishap while some always blame others.

12. Excessive self-pity.
Some people spend more time feeling sorry for themselves than expending the effort necessary to overcome the problem.

13. Excessive dependency.
Some people expect others to do for them what they ought to be doing themselves.

14. Wallowing in personal difficulties.
Some people let their personal difficulties interfere grossly with their work.

15. Distractibility and lack of concentration.
Even some very intelligent people have very short attention spans. (*waives*)

16. Spreading oneself too thin or too thick.
Undertaking too many activities may result in none being completed on time. Undertaking too few can also result in missed opportunities and reduced levels of accomplishment.

17. Inability to delay gratification.
Some people reward themselves and are rewarded by others for finishing small tasks, while avoiding bigger tasks that would earn them larger rewards.

18. Inability to see the forest for the trees.
Some people become obsessed with details and are either unwilling or unable to see or deal with the larger picture in the projects they undertake.

19. Lack of balance between critical, analytical thinking and creative, synthetic thinking.
It is important for people to learn what kind of thinking is expected of them in each situation.

20. Too little or too much self-confidence.
Lack of self-confidence can gnaw away at a person’s ability to get things done and become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Conversely, individuals with too much self confidence may not know when to admit they are wrong or in need of self-improvement.

According to today’s cues, IQ can be a determining factor in success in jobs, marriage, and not going to prison. It has nothing, however, to do with motivation, opportunity, education, or happiness.

http://v1.tinypic.com/player.swf?file=data169/93/2w2iq8j

Everyone makes mistakes and the busier you are, the more mistakes you will make.

The only question is, “How well and how effectively do you deal with the inevitable ups and downs of life?”

Using Stumbling Blocks as Stepping Stones

There are two ways (to put it simply) to look at the world: the benevolent way or the malevolent way. People with a malevolent or negative worldview take a victim stance, seeing life as a continuous succession of problems and a process of unfairness and oppression. They don’t expect a lot and they don’t get much. When things go wrong, they shrug their shoulders and passively accept that this is the way life is and there isn’t anything they can do to make it better.

On the other hand, people with a benevolent or positive worldview see the world around them as filled with opportunities and possibilities. They believe that everything happens as part of a great process designed to make them successful and happy. They approach their lives, their work, and their relationships with optimism, cheerfulness, and a general attitude of positive expectations. They expect a lot and they are seldom disappointed.

Flex Your Mental Muscles

When you develop the skill of learning from your mistakes, you become the kind of person who welcomes obstacles and setbacks as opportunities to flex your mental muscles and move ahead. You look at problems as rungs on the ladder of success that you grab onto as you pull your way higher.

Two of the most common ways to deal with mistakes are invariably fatal to high achievement. The first common but misguided way to handle a mistake is the failure to accept it when it occurs. According to statistics, 70 percent of all decisions we make will be wrong. That’s an average. This means that some people will fail more than 70 percent of the time, and some people will fail less. It is hard to believe that most of the decisions we make could turn out to be wrong in some way. In fact, if this is the case, how can our society continue to function at all?

Cut Your Losses

The fact is that our society, our families, and our relationships continue to survive and thrive because intelligent people tend to cut their losses and minimize their mistakes. It is only when people refuse to accept that they have made a bad choice or decision—and prolong the consequences by sticking to that bad choice or decision—that mistakes become extremely expensive and hurtful.

Learn From Your Mistakes

The second common approach that people take with regard to their mistakes, one that hurts innumerable lives and careers, is the failure to use your mistakes to better yourself and to improve the quality of your mind and your thinking.

Learning from your mistakes is an essential skill that enables you to develop the resilience to be a master of change rather than a victim of change. The person who recognizes that he has made a mistake and changes direction the fastest is the one who will win in an age of increasing information, technology and competition.

By remaining fast on your feet, you will be able to out-play and out-position your competition. You will become a creator of circumstances rather than a creature of circumstances.

‘Someday’ is a word filled with promise and possibility. “Someday I want to …” we say dreamily, finishing the sentence with a variety of specific or vague plans. There are books to read, trips to take, projects to start or finish.

But then clocks tick and calendar pages turn. Months and years go by, and “someday” never quite comes. Caught up in careers and families, duties and interruptions, we become masters of postponement.

Ask friends and relatives what they’d like to do “someday,” and the responses can be intriguing: Start painting again. Take piano lessons. Kicking the living shit out of the DPRK in the game Mercenaries. Visit the Great Wall. Trace family genealogy. Have oral sex. Attend an opera.(sic)

So many dreams, so little spare time.

Still, even the simple act of putting pen to paper and listing those dreams can spur hope that the simpler items, at least, could be carved out of moments that might otherwise be frittered away. From there, who knows? Even the grander goals might begin to take shape.

If it’s never too early to start a life list, it may never be too late, either. Someday could come tomorrow, or even today.